this was goodgood
i miss her so much we kissed several times in the following days, we cuddled, she cried, i was with her, WITH her, i know her now, i love her now more . deeply. than i could before. my poor beloved, i took a picture of us, in it we are happy, i really like the picture. maybe she will be free one day. maybe i can help. in bath I've been thinking about protection and standing between her and the monster. idk how i can do it, and if i can possibly be brave enough. but I will offer my help, my presence, my body and health, for her and her daughter's wellbeing, and i will try to be brave in my terrible fear. now remembering us, everything we've done with each other, feels so sweet and unexpected and distant and like something out of a nice fever dream. but it was real, it was the most real thing in a while. the closest thing I've ever had. every time i smell her clothes there's a ping (pang?) of pain in my stomach, and sweetness please be well